Sample Clearing

Click on the underlined questions to bring to the front of your mind persistent unwanted/hidden thoughts, considerations, withholds, stuffed-perpetrations, and incompletes.

Use the bolded questions below to trigger memories of incompletes.

To whom are you afraid* to say what?

OK Kerry, you say this stuff works, so here goes. First, to heck with the speling. I'm afraid to tell my wife that I cheated on her during our engagement. I'm afraid to tell my daughter's teacher that I don't like it that she doesn't always collect the homework. I'm afraid to tell my wife's mother that I'm offended by her racist humor. I'm afraid to tell my wife's grandmother that she stinks of urine. I'm afraid to tell my boss that I come in late a lot. I'm afraid to ask my boss for a raise. I feel badly that I'm looking for another job without telling my boss.**  I'm afraid to tell my daughter that I don't like the boy she's dating and if I had my way I wouldn't allow her to see him anymore. I'm afraid to ask her if she's had sex with him.

Note 1: A thought such as, "I lied to my mother about going to the library" when communicated, disappears the effects of that specific lie. The thought will exist as a memory but without the negative charge attached to the deceit. A thought communicated creates space for other incompletes to bubble to the surface. This is why it's valuable to clear frequently. The "good" stuff, the hidden "forgotten" stuff your mind doesn't want to acknowledge, is usually buried deep under dozens of other thoughts. "As a Support Group Facilitator I've been clearing every other week for 45 years and new incompletes still come to the surface—petty childhood thefts or stinginess, temper-tantrums, pouts, abuses, and sneakinesses—perpetrations I had pushed to the back of my mind thinking I had gotten away with them." —Kerry

Note 2: "I lied a lot when I was a child," is a good beginning but it's a generalization, it doesn't address the specific lie that runs you. "I deceived my parents when I conned my date into deceiving both sets of parents; I manipulated him into begging me for sex." is an example of a specific deceit; it's an unacknowledged perpetration that most adults are dragging around into each interaction to this very day.

* If you're not "afraid" of saying something to someone then ask yourself what considerations, thoughts, or reasons, come up for you when you think about telling  _ _ _ _ about . . . ?

** Notice that you can insert any thought that comes to mind any time or place.

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What are you hiding from whom?

I'm hiding from a merchant that I stole several comic books when I was a kid. I'm hiding from the IRS that I didn't file income taxes for teen jobs. I'm hiding from my wife that I think a lot about _ _ _ _  in the sales department. I'm hiding from my dad that one night when I said I was going to the library I also went out drinking. I'm hiding from my folks that _ _ _ _ _ and I smoked a lot of pot when we were dating. I'm hiding from my wife's dad that I think his jokes aren't funny and that some are even too gross for my daughter to hear. I'm hiding from Joan's folks that I think they are alcoholics and that I don't like to visit them because they become obnoxious when they drink. I'm hiding from all religious people who use the words Christ or God in their conversations that they turn me off; even worse, when a religious proselytizer knocks on my door to . . . .

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Communicate a resentment

I resent people who create us/them when they (proudly in-your-face or covertly) communicate their religious belief/organization with adornments, hair, head gear/scarfs or distinctive religious jewelry. I resent my high school English teacher who let me con her into passing me. I resent people who drive less than the speed limit. I resent mainland online orgs that charge exorbitant shipping and handling fees when other merchants prove it can be done cheaper. I resent newspaper editors who write, ". . . anonymous source . . ." instead of the quoted person's name. I resent people who compose the voting ballot options for causing me confusion. I.e. "Shall rescind the anti pro-abortion rights amendment."

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For what in your life would you like to be acknowledged?

I'd like to be acknowledged for cheating on a high school math test. I'd like to be acknowledged for lying to my dad when he asked if I scratched the Toyota. I'd like to be acknowledged for talking a friend of mine into masturbating with me when I was ten. I'd like to be acknowledged for talking (conning) _ _ _ _ _ into having sex when she said no at first. I'd like to be acknowledged for making sex more important than supporting my high school sweetheart in studying so as to have a  profession. I'd like to be acknowledged for conning my high school sweetheart into deceiving her parents so as to have sex. I'd like to be acknowledged for not telling my spouse that I find our neighbor attractive. I'd like to be acknowledged for getting good grades in college, for picking up litter when no one is watching, and for being nice to old people. I'd like to be acknowledged for all the times I said I did the chores but didn't, ditto for lying to my mother about brushing my teeth. I'd also like to be acknowledged for all the chores that I did do, some done very well, others very poorly. Especially I'd like to be acknowledged for emptying the can of paint in the back yard and then telling my mom that we ran out of paint. That's all for today.

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Who in your life might be hexing you because they believe you don't yet deserve success and happiness—because of the way you treated them?

Who would say that materially (money/possessions) they ended up on the short end of the stick in their relationship with you? (read Who gets what in a divorce?).

Who would say that you have communicated abusively with them and, that you have yet to acknowledged to them that you know that you were abusive?

Ultimate integrity is not that you don't lie or verbally abuse another, but that you can be trusted to clean up such perpetrations.

 Obviously, the most value comes from verbally delivering the withholds and acknowledging (cleaning up) the abuses, lies and perpetrations. Once you are aware that withholding thoughts from a loved one or family member is abusive (deceitful) then choosing to withhold begins to have even more undesirable consequences. It could be said that The Clearing Process creates space for you to begin over with a clean slate.

BTW: If you don't know where one of your "victims" is living, or if they are dead, you can "pray" your thoughts to them; the same applies to acknowledging a specific ancestor (or all of your ancestors). I.e. "Thank you for all that you did to ensure a better life for me."

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Keep in mind that incompletes hide incompletes:

That is to say, you piled feeling badly on top of your first lie, the one for which you have yet to be caught. Hiding a lie guarantees another lie, and another, etc. Your integrity is such that you'll continue lying (automatically/unconsciously) or, keep causing others to lie to, or deceive you, and to withhold thoughts from you, until you clean up your firsts and acknowledge the effects of all subsequent ones. There are hundreds (actually thousands) of deceits and lies covering up the first one. Today's clearing will uncover more. You may run out of things to email to the coach today however, when you come back tomorrow you'll notice you have more. Eventually your clearings will all be current, about recent/today's perps (abuses) and withholds. If you keep clearing, even when it's very embarrassing, you will find yourself choosing to not withhold, deceive or lie. Usually what happens is someone will do a few clearings and stop; they don't know why, they just do—it's partly because the mind doesn't want another's mind to know just how uncommitted it is, or has been, to having life work; it doesn't like witnesses. Also, the mind comes up against a current perpetration, say choosing to continue to interact with an abusive (agreement-breaking) person knowing it (the mind) is enabling them to be abusive, and is hiding that thought during a clearing.  In a relationship in which both are committed to zero significant thoughts withheld, the first thought withheld creates a condition of out-integrity, after which mediocrity sets in, it's the beginning of the end of ever-expanding growth and aliveness.

Your aim is not to stop abusing or lying, nor is it about making a decision to not abuse or lie anymore. The game is to catch yourself (to observe yourself having just lied or abused another) and to communicate it (acknowledge it verbally or in writing) to the person you abused or yelled at, or to at least one other person (such as a therapist or a Clearing Facilitator). If you do the process regularly you will begin to have a choice. Soon you will hear yourself having just verbally abused another or lied and you'll have the awareness, the integrity (your integrity will be closer to the surface), to verbally acknowledge the abuse or to put in correction immediately. Eventually you'll automatically stop verbally abusing another or lying, not from trying to change yourself, or from making yourself wrong, or feeling badly about yourself, but from having a conscious choice. Instead of walking around in life with the aura of a somewhat sneaky irresponsible person you will experience being in-integrity, being whole and complete. Eventually you will attract like-people into your life. You will no longer have a need to attract those who are out-integrity so as to mirror your own out-integrity. An "accident" will not be about you punishing you for an unacknowledged perpetration.

A person who operates from integrity, one who is complete and committed to communicating openly and honestly, can experience another's out-integrity; it's an aura thing. As such, they usually choose to interact with you as little as possible because they know a closer relationship with you will generate undesirable problems—that your karma is still generating consequences from unacknowledged childhood perpetrations. Those presently around you have no idea that they have no choice other than to keep certain thoughts to themselves. A person who is whole and complete (in-integrity) creates space for open and honest communications.

Last edited 10/15//22

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